Merry Christmas to everyone. We are still busy with school and soccer activities as I write this; I haven't put up any lights, but the kids want them all over the yard. Now, that is asking a LOT since we have about an acre, but we'll put some in the front yard.
It's only about 9:45 PM, November 20th, right now, and the kids are in bed, at least they are in their bedrooms. Bea just finished watching her favorite DVD: Hairspray. She is dancing: hopping up and down, swinging her arms back and forth as she listens to the last song. I watched it, once, and that was enough. But, Bea could watch it every night, and still want to watch it more!! She knows, now, to only watch it in the addition, when I am not at home on Wednesday's when I take the kids to AWANA's. Otherwise, she watches it in her "apartment," which is what she calls her bedroom. It is a wonderful room for her, built by Leonard, a couple of years ago. She has her own TV, video player (of course), even a refrigerator. Every evening, I hear her laughing as she watches some of the old, classic comedies.
It is so fun watching her love for life and everyone she meets. She is now 27 years old, and continues to absolutely, joyfully love her job at Dairy Queen and the Animal Clinic. Becca is one of those people, who you feel you need to protect. She is so loving and trusting, that she would buy you whatever you wanted, even if she didn't know you. She would give you her whole paycheck if you asked. One of her favorite things to do is buy DVD's, especially Lucille Ball ones, and musicals. It is amazing to hear her sing all the songs, each and every word is correct. But, she only sings using 3 or 4 notes, so singing with her is a bit difficult. Her joy in singing, though, fills our hearts with smiles.
I think the most popular person in our family is Mark, our babe. Actually, he is now almost 3 years old. He is awfully smart, maybe too smart (maybe I should say sneaky). The other day he came into the addition, and stood behind the couch. Gary knew he must have something in his hands, and told him to show him what was in his hand. He held up his right hand, and nothing was in it. Gary said to show his other hand, and he held it up, with nothing in it. He had switched the object from one hand to the other!! He had such an innocent look on his face, almost as if to say, "What are you talking about?" He was hiding a large container of breakfast cereal.
Left: Markeen trying so hard to blow up a balloon. He is almost 3 years old.
Right: Daddy and Markeen are so relaxed with each other. that is total bonding don't you think?
Markeen also loves to play hide and seek, and is quite good at it. The only problem is, that he is too good. I have had a scare a few times when he hid so quietly, and would not respond to my call. Of course once it was when he was hiding with a loaf of bread under my computer desk. He was so quiet that I didn't even know he was there when I sat down...until there was a soft touch to my leg.
Markeen also loves any Baby Einstein tapes, and knows how to use the DVD player. One morning, very early, I heard music in the addition. As I came out, I saw that the TV was on, and a Baby Einstein tape was playing!! Sure enough, there was Mark, asleep on the coach. I now have bells on his door knob, and one of those child safety things over the other door knob.
At night, he has to have music playing, usually classical music. There is one thing everyone wants changed about him, except me, and that is his long hair. To me, it is gorgeous: big, beautiful curls, tiny long ringlets, and a halo of soft, straight hair. Gary and Kim, especially, want it cut, but they respect my desires to keep it long for now. They will ask Markus if he wants it cut, and he will usually say, "No way." Ahhh, that's my son.
Kathy is now 6 years old. I can*t believe she is 6, the time went way too fast. She is in kindergarten, and absolutely loves it. She tries hard to read and write, and will make the cutest pictures. Often she will write a message of "I love you, Mom." Boy, can that girl get me to smile. She tells me that she is pretty mad that a girl at school talks about having a boyfriend, "Oh yuck, Mom." I'm not sure what a boyfriend means at that age, but I know at the middle school level "going out" can mean just meeting at the lunch table.
Now, it is December 17, and I'm almost done with this Christmas book. A couple of days ago, Kathy had a high temperature. She didn*t have a cough, etc. and was back to a normal temperature in 3 days. But, she cried each time we said she had to stay home from school. She also cried when I told her she couldn't go to the Basketball Academy on Saturday. She was already dressed in her basketball uniform (which is kind of funny, since the "shorts" are almost to her ankles, and the shirt is more like a dress). I almost gave in as the tears rolled down her face when I told her she had to stay home. We all have to face disappointments in life, but it's hard on a mama's heart to see our kids disappointed.
Joel is 8 years old. He still has chubby cheeks, but he is growing up, and they are smaller then last year. Soccer and basketball are his favorite sports. He looks forward to Saturday's when he can attend the Basketball Academy. It is a fantastic program, ran by a warm, loving man who devotes all his Saturday's to helping kids improve their basketball skills, but also improve their self-esteem and sportsmanship. Joel would do anything for Coach Joe. What a wonderful model for the kids, and he also teaches us parents a lot too.
In school, Joel is doing great with academics, especially reading. Socialization is a bit difficult, at times, but he has a wonderful teacher who is able to sense when he is having a rough time with a peer, and guides him to another activity. He probably has Aspergers Syndrome. It is so hard for him to let go of things. Sometimes he will hold a grudge for hours, and maybe even carry it over to the next day. But, he is progressing, and seems to have fewer and fewer tantrums each year. Marc and Joel are the best of buddies, and Marc reads a short book, sings a song, and prays with Joel each night, usually.
Hmmm, let's see. Oh yes, Sandy is next. She is 10 years old, in the 5th grade, and delightful, full of laughter and smiles, but now has a few stubborn times (she is growing up). About two times a week, she gives me beautiful pictures. Art and writing are two of her most favorite things to do. She also loves to act, sing and play teacher. Her soccer skills are really improving, and she is currently on an indoor soccer team. Now, I don't think we should talk about her bedroom organization skills, as they are just about 0. Yup, she is a messy person, but boy can she choose the cutest outfits for her and Kathy. At her school, she is finding that some kids make fun of the kids in the special needs class. That hurts her, and she will stand up for the kids, telling others that "They are just like us, you know." I'm proud of her.
Janice and her middle school band teacher, Chuck and friend, Jack at the County Fair. They played a song that Janice wrote. Chuck worked with her for several days. After singing it two different days, they won a second place trophy!! We are so thankful to teachers who take such a strong interest in their students, even years later. Jack came down from Washington, just to help Janice. I know all three had so much fun. Later, at school, another teacher heard her singing for the choir, and asked her to sing for 2 more classes that day. She is anxiously waiting for the official papers saying that her song is copywrited. Janice will be going to the community College in the Spring of 2008, to major in Radio Broadcasting, counseling, or Speech Therapy.
Joel, 8, Kathy, 6, Sandy, 10, and Roger, 12, on their first day of school. They go to a public, alternative school which is for kids kindergarten through 8th grade.
Roger is almost 12, no that can't be right. I'll go check my book of kids' birthdates, yup, he was 12 on Dec. 8. He is ADDHD, and without his meds he is very active. With his meds, he can concentrate better, and sure feels better about himself. Basketball and soccer are his favorite sports, and he loves everything exciting in life. Today, he was climbing trees in the backyard, even though it was cold and getting dark. Yesterday, he was cuddled up with me on the couch. In between times, he had a 'few' candies, without permission, made a mess in his room, ran through the house a zillion times, fell on his knee, again, bumped his elbow, giggled frequently, ate a few more candies without permission, found matching outfits for Joel and himself, and cried because he was afraid that the raccoons would attack Rita, who had gone outside, in the dark. Rita likes to sneak out, and scare the kids by popping up by the addition windows. That makes for a lot of screaming for sure.
Rita is 12, almost 13. Almost a teen. Again, they just grow up too fast. She is half tom boy, and half young lady. The transition is beautiful, and exciting, and challenging. School is great for her (she has an "A" grade point average). Rita is determined to go to a private, Christian High School, in 2009, as do several of her best friends, and even one of her nieces. Hopefully, we'll get some financial aid (some?? It will need to be a LOT). Her positive, fun personality touches everyone, and she has many friends. Laughter is her favorite way of expressing her experiences, but she can also be quite 'expressive' with her displeasures, also. She can find humor anywhere, even when I'm upset at her about something. She will still sit on my lap, 'just because.'
She wants to be a professional soccer player, or an animal cop. Basketball and track are two more of her abilities. She is quick, fast, and can dribble around just about anyone. This year she has been in a club soccer team. It is super expensive, but she was given a full scholarship. I was totally shocked at that blessing. Parents on the team have been great in helping with transportation (they have traveled all the way to Seattle).
Next comes Moria, who is 13. She is in the 7th grade, just like Rita. I did have to request that the school not place them in the same class, as there is just too much competition between the two girls. Art and crafts, and writing stories and songs take priority in Moria's life, (oh yes, and boys), above even grades. She has Cerebral Palsy, but has perfect speech, and it doesn't affect her hands and arms.
At school, she uses her electric wheelchair, and kids do move out of her way when she comes down the hall. She does have to deal with what she feels is discrimination, though. Kids in middle school, and even in highschool, often are trying to figure out how they fit into the popular groups. They don't want people looking at them, so they draw attention to others who are different. Sometimes, I wonder if some of it is immature boys trying to figure out how to flirt with a cute girl like Moria. Either way, it bothers Moria a lot. She so wants to fit in, to be liked, as does any girl her age. One boy will call her a "cripple." The school deals with it immediately, but it continues. Another boy, grabs her backpack, from the back of her wheelchair, and laughs as she tries to get it back. She now keeps it in her lap. He will also "jump a ride" on the back of her wheelchair, which she absolutely does NOT like.
Sometimes I wonder if we have an influence on others, outside our family. I have always said that God uses us to help others, and I think He uses non-Christians to help also. I have so much to learn. For quite awhile I wondered why a pastor always mentioned that we should be open to spreading the word of God, helping others know of His love. For me, I wanted him to remind us to be open to the lessons we have to learn from those who we tend to ignore, to those we look away from. It could be one of "those" people, the one who smells pretty badly, who has torn clothes, and swears as he wobbles past us. It could be the "loner" at school, or the one whose speech is too hard to understand. Does he have something to teach us? There is a song, written by Tommy Shane Steiner, of Austin, Texas that says,
"What if he's an angel sent here from heaven
and he's making certain that you're doing your best
To take the time to help one another
Brother are you gonna pass that test?"
When I first heard that song, I cried. It was MY song, it should be your song, it should be everyone's song. I think of that song often during the week. I try to be open to all those windows that the Lord opens for me. I listen for His soft gentle voice filling me with joy, like a warm breeze in the Spring.
I go on the internet every day. One day, I did a google on Janice's name and found an article about her. It is a perfect example of how we can affect people we don't know, in ways we didn't know, and might not ever hear about. Here is the article:
Perfect Wings
by William Crawford
September 2002
"... I got an email from Jerry, that began: "Good morning William. I'm in Boston, and my thoughts are you should write about Janice." I had written Jerry about Mark Wills' song, "Don't Laugh at Me" and Janice. I heard the song just last month. The last evening of this conference, the host introduced a student named Janice and asked her to come forward and sing:
Janice's accompanist assists her on stage. Janice cannot see. Her face and left hand are badly deformed. The audience fills with sadness and pity. The accompanist puts the microphone in her hand.
A soft, well-spoken voice greets us. She smiles: a warm, soulful, wonderful smile. Our aversion begins to transform. She speaks humorously and captures our hearts. Then, she sings, "Don't Laugh at Me."
I'm a cripple on the corner You pass me on the street
Don't laugh at me, Don't call me names
Don't get your pleasure from my pain
In God's eyes we're all the same
Someday we'll all have perfect wings Don't laugh at me.
Three hundred spirits surge. Janice lifts us like dry leaves in a fresh wind. Sadness and pity retreat from love, hope, joy and wonder. We are lifted on perfect wings to a splendid rapture...a transcendent moment: a node of inspiration.
We thrust to our feet in adulation and applause. We turn to each other with dewy-eyes and astonishment. We know we have, so unexpectedly, glimpsed something higher, more wonderful than our trite lives; something of the spirit.
We remark. We expound. We settle down. Soon, we are seemingly back to normal, though something abides in each of us.
Janice, I find out, is one of 26 children with disabilities adopted by Doug and Gloria. Born without any, she has glass eyes. Part of her brain grew where her nose was supposed to be. She has undergone more than 10 surgeries to correct a cleft lip and restructure her misshapen face.
"Children sometimes make fun of her," the local newspaper wrote. "`Get that dumb blind girl out of here,' a fellow student yelled at her."
"I wasn't hurt by that," Janice explained, "because problems are not about me. Problems are about everyone else. And I'm here to help everyone else."
Back home, I find I cannot let go of my vision of Janice. It is a geas, compelling me to think and write. With each pause in writing my mind drifts to the scene of Janice singing and smiling at us. I have always thought of angels as surreal creatures of unconditional love. Now, I know they can exist in the flesh. And, that caring, courageous folk like Janice's family can help engender and nurture them.
This is the story that Jerry encourages me to witness as I continue my own journey; as I strive to see only the perfect wings in others."
This is one of my favorite pictures. Markeen listens to Roger and Sandy practice.
"We've all heard the old adage that it's better to give than to receive. Giving is a gift because it increases the bond between us and the person to whom we have given," (from Psychology Today)
Psychologist Ellen J. Langer says, "We usually think that the more we care about someone, the more we want to give to them," she says. "This is probably true. But what is even more interesting is that the more we give, the more we come to care about the person to whom we are giving."
Brain research points out a more scientific positive impact of giving. The same regions of the brain that are associated with the reward and the good feeling you have when you get something yourself, like money, were the same areas that were activated when you give. The researchers also said that not only were the same areas involved, but in fact they were more activated when you give than when you receive. I find that to be so interesting, and so true.
Years ago, we adopted a 6 year old girl whose hygiene wasn't the best. She would burp, spit up, drool, pass gas, mess her pants, and things like that. She would mumble, gripe, and her skin was rough from not getting baths on a regular basis. And her body odor was something else. I had chosen to love her, but it sure was difficult to hold her, give her a kiss goodnight or even brush her hair. This type of un-Christian feelings within me, caused me to feel guilty, to feel I wasn't a good person, but I tried hard to love her as God loved her. That didn't happen right away, but the Lord did show me how to learn to love her: I took time to do little things for her, things that didn't take much time, but were, at first, hard for me to do. Her smell seemed to be the hardest for me to deal with, so I fixed her nice, warm bubble bathes. I started rubbing nice lotion onto her arms, especially her dry elbows, several times a day. I moved up to her face, then her rough knees. Next, I moved onto her hair, oiling it, gently using a pick to loosen up the curls. Little by little, love did fill in the void I felt for her. I didn't even notice that at first, and it wasn't a quick change. As the weeks went by, and I learned to buy her cute things for her hair, etc. I found I was enjoying doing things for her. Praise the Lord, He taught me to begin to love as He loves...
Kathy loves soccer, as you can plainly see.
Markeen was super happy to see Santa and the moving, electrical toys.
Sometimes, it has been hard for me to accept things that people give to us. My pride gets in the way, I guess. But, part of the reason is that I know there are so many people, right in our own communities, who have so much less then us. Things have changed for us, financially. In the past, we had plenty of money to spare for extra's. We couldn't take expensive trips, or buy a large, SUV, but we could give a little to others at Christmas, etc. Now, it is harder. So many people have helped us, at times when I didn't even know I needed the help, or when I didn't even ask for help. Someone heard that our 2nd washer was totally broken, and ordered a brand new one for us!! I'm still not sure who they are or how they found out.
Another time, someone gave us a check, which helped us buy a 12 passenger van. I know who that person is, and I thank them sooo much. Little by little I have been able to pay off all bills, except for a couple of medical bills (one bill will take us 33 years to pay-he has accepted low payments, though). Of course, there are always new medical bills that come up, but basically the cars are paid, we have no credit card debts, and I budget for the medical bills. I save up a small amount each month for car repairs, home repairs, educational things for the kids, gifts, co-pays, and a few other things. I know that I cannot pay for credit card bills, so I must save up for those things. Some people think their financial situation is tough, and they will say, "Oh, we aren't well-off, we have to work hard for our children to go to private school, and we have to save up to go to Hawaii." I usually just laugh to myself, thinking, "I can't even afford private school, and I sure can't even save up enough for Hawaii." Then, I realize how much the Lord has blessed us in other ways.
It is now December 19, and some kids from a Christian School, senior class, are here, raking wet leaves, cleaning rain gutters, fixing some fences, and even baking cookies. Mmmmm, the house smells so good. I wonder how long those cookies will last (I already know that won't be long).
For about 1 1/2 years, I have been trying to get the school district and the City, to extend a sidewalk northward from the end of our driveway, for Moria. She uses a wheelchair and had to have Rita go with her for safety reasons, when she went to her school bus stop. The sidewalk went to the south, to the corner, then stopped. They would have to go into the roadway, around the corner, and down to the 3rd driveway. There were no sidewalks there, no bicycle lane, and sometimes there would be a delivery truck or a pile of leaves, which would mean they had to go further into the roadway. I wrote lots of letters. I received lots of comments, saying it probably was needed, but no money was available. Finally, the school district contacted a contractor, who then called several of his friends in the construction business. All of them were excited to help. So, now there is a sidewalk for Moria. She does not have to cross any streets or driveways. She is excited to be able to go to the bustop by herself, and I am thankful she is safe. Rita is glad she has extra time now to fix her hair (and boy does she have a LOT of hair). Several businesses donated labor and materials that totaled over $8,000.00!! I am so thankful to them.
Martha is now 24 years old. Recently she moved in with a friend of hers who works for DHS. Bree has the cutest little boy, whom she adopted. Martha does a little babysitting for her, so she gets a lower rent bill. It is such a good situation, as Bree's mom is just across the street, and they are all strong Christians. Martha is taking classes at the community college this year. And, she has a boyfriend, Chris. She is close enough (10 minutes away) from us to come home lots.
Erin, 41, will be attending College, majoring in accounting. He helps out a lot with transportation, babysitting, tutoring, and cleaning out the rain drains. Gary, 40, has been here for a few weeks, and he also helps out. He will be moving in with a friend in a few days. He is also Roger's basketball coach for 6th grade boys. This is his first time being a coach, but he has played on two college basketball teams.
Marc is now 14 years old and a Freshman in High School. He loves school and people and the Lord. This year he did cross country track for the first time, and loves running. He will often go for several runs over the weekend. He also loves singing, and has the greatest choir leader at his highschool. He just joined the chess club, and loves that also. His brain tumor hasn't caused any problems for quite awhile, thank the Lord.
Jay is 26, and tells everyone that he has two jobs at the local community college: recycling paper, and recycling cans & bottles. He knows just about everyone where ever he goes, and one can hear his voice on the far side of any large room. He also loves Special Olympics track, basketball and soccer, and is so proud of every award he gets.
George now works at Goodwill and since he now has a stable work schedule, he has been getting to work on time. He goes by bus, and enjoys this "independence." He loves to "read" even though he can't read. It is so inspiring to see him sitting on the couch, reading his Bible.
I am busy with mommy things, but I have to take time to do things just for me, such as playing the piano, learning new guitar chords, reading, walking, singing, or doing research on the internet. I hope to take some website and photography classes, sometime.
Markeen had a temperature of 105.2!! I took him to the doctor, and sure enough he had pneumonia again. I already knew that, but the X-ray showed it for sure. Actually, he has been doing pretty good, and hasn't gotten sick very much, lately. I think his body is just getting stronger and stronger. He may have lung problems all his life, including asthma, though.
Joel, 8, Kathy, 6, Sandy, 10, and Roger, 12, on their first day of school. They go to a public, alternative school which is for kids kindergarten through 8th grade.
This is one of my favorite pictures. Markeen listens to Roger and Sandy practice.
Kathy loves soccer, as you can plainly see.
Go Back to My:
HOMEPAGE
